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THE LOCKDOWN LIST

In a post lockdown London, what can we take away from our time spent inside? How can we look at what seems essential and what isn't? A list and analysis of the things I have and haven't used since lockdown.


I got really into journalling over lockdown. I think perhaps in the luxury of time and the vastness of silent moments ahead, it seemed prudent to write about it all. To dissect every moment of what felt like a really monumental thing. Then I wondered - could I also take a physical inventory? Of the things, I have used, touched, seen. What I have missed and what I haven't. And if I did, what would I learn? So here we go:



Things I haven’t used over the lockdown


Spotlight

Foundation

Half my jewellery drawer

Nail varnish

Large Supermarkets

Amazon

Heat on my hair

Zoom

Portable phone charger

Alcohol

Eternal busyness

The word yes too much

Whatsapp

The gym

The scales

Mirrors

Fast fashion

Spur of the moment purchases I later regret

Food as comfort

“Going out” clothes

Takeaway snacks or coffee that cost a fortune

Public transport that costs a fortune

Pints that cost a fortune



Things I have used more than ever during the lockdown


Writing

My friends

My local greengrocer with the lovely family who smile lots

Blogs

Parks

My legs for walking

My bike

Sun Cream

Curl mousse (it’s the 90’s again over here)

Activism

Yoga

Podcasts

Zoom

Books

The bath

Meditation

Alcohol

Excuses

The word no

Youtube

Food as a comfort

Dungarees



I’m going to draw some conclusions from this.


Sometimes lockdown felt like a retreat. Sometimes lockdown felt like a barren desert. I can live without a lot of things. I can really not live without some things. I really can save money when I put my mind to it. Looking for acting jobs in a jobless climate is sort of pointless. It's ok to feel like this is pointless. You don't have to spring into immediate action. Sometimes it's nice to just let go of things we try and hold so tightly. I don’t need 8 nail varnish colours. I don’t need any nail varnish colours. I need my friends like I need air. I need air. I need green space at least every other day. To have access to green space is a privilege. I am incredibly privileged. Home is what you make it in your mind. Home is somewhere you can read on a Tuesday morning with your feet up on the headboard of your bed. I should spend more Tuesday mornings reading. Productivity is quite poisonous. That balance is really funny sometimes in the way it shows up - if you are really honest with yourself. Alcohol is sometimes great and sometimes not. As much as you might try to not use comfort food - sometimes it’s the source of comfort. (Duh). And that’s ok. Rules about food are stupid. Rules about your life are stupid. This meditation stuff really is good but it’s fucking hard.



What are yours?



Author: Olivia Foan